I never thought of myself as an addict, but I did end up addicted to anti-anxiety medication after developing Generalized Anxiety Disorder. At some point, the medicine stopped being a way to deal with the nervousness and panic attacks, and became something my body craved. I knew that I needed help fast. Fortunately, a local drug rehab program includes support for people like me. They helped me wean off the medication, use methods like massage therapy to help my nerves heal, and even provided ongoing counseling for our family. I don't know how I would have made it without their help. If you suspect that your medication has crossed the line from being helpful to hurtful, take heart. Let me tell you about my journey out of addiction and back to wholeness.
It doesn't matter if you've been married for two years or twenty years, finances can put a huge strain on your relationship. Unfortunately, for some couples, financial issues can actually end their relationship. In some instances, excessive spending is to blame; however, in other situations, loss of employment is the culprit. The point is that financial issues can come from anywhere and they are often unpredictable. Knowing how to navigate through financial struggles is key to keeping your relationship healthy.
When dealing with debt in your relationship, make certain that you aren't being judgmental. This is especially important if your partner's actions are the reason for the financial strain in the relationship. For example, say your spouse went out and made a huge purchase that you two couldn't afford. As a result, you two were unable to pay your mortgage on time for the month.
While it's okay to express your concern over their actions, it's important not to make your spouse feel angry or upset by your concern. Never make accusatory statements or show any signs of anger—remain calm. Making your spouse feel this way will only inhibit the communication between you two in the future and make your spouse reluctant to be honest with you, which will only cause greater issues.
Make a Plan
In many cases, the reason for the financial issue is that you and your partner haven't come up with a plan concerning your finances. It's important that you two establish a guideline by which you will spend your money, pay bills, and handle debt. This plan will serve as a map for navigating finances throughout your relationship. The period after you have incurred a great deal of debt isn't the time to start trying to figure out how to eliminate it.
Creating a budget and setting spending limits are a great place to begin. However, this brainstorming session should also include feedback between you two on how each other's spending habits affect your relationship. Oftentimes, the other spouse is unaware of the impact they are having on you unless you speak up and say something. Not only will you two be making a solid financial plan for your future, but you will also be communicating important information between you.
If you and your partner are unable to navigate financial stress, a relationship counselor like Sharon O'Connell, MA can help you. If you and your partner are dealing with an issue, don't hesitate to seek professional assistance.Share